There’s truth in the saying that all leadership is communication. How well you communicate determines whether people understand your ideas, take your suggestions, and how influential you are. If you manage a team, they’ll be quick to interpret what your words and body language mean. The less clear you are, the more room for interpretation.
I coached an executive who came into my office one morning with newfound clarity saying:
“It’s as if every time I talk, I’m speaking through a megaphone.”
He was spot on – that’s what leadership communication is all about.
At work, we’re constantly sending messages, whether we mean to or not. Many people are at their best during informal interactions – in the hallway or over coffee. Right now while nearly every conversation has to be scheduled, whether on Zoom or by phone, casual conversations are all but non-existent. Try these proven tips to make sure your meaning comes through clearly.
1. Know the Difference Between Suggesting and Requesting
Years ago my boss told me a story about traveling shortly after 9/11. He was going through airport security when the TSA agent said “Sir, I recommend you remove your shoes.” My boss acknowledged the request, but he kept his shoes on. The agent repeated his recommendation, clearly frustrated.
My boss said that he’d heard him, and if he was required to remove his shoes he would. But, if it was merely a suggestion he would choose to keep his shoes on. Granted this behavior was somewhat irreverent, but you get the idea. A suggestion or recommendation can be interpreted, and others will choose whether or not to take it. If you want something done, ask clearly and seek confirmation that the other person understands what’s required.
2. Don’t Sandwich Performance Feedback
I was once in an HR Business Partner role for over 1,000 employees during annual performance reviews. Knowing managers have a tendency to be “nice” when writing reviews, I chose to read all 60 documents that were going to the people with the lowest rating – the one that meant they were below expectations and their jobs were at risk.
Some of these reviews were so favorable, I had to make sure I was reading the right one. By trying to be nice, the commentary was so positive that it wasn’t clear why the person got a low rating or what the possible consequences would be. I subscribe to Brené Brown’s “clear is kind” approach to feedback. Meaning – the truly kind thing to do is deliver an honest message when someone makes a mistake or isn’t performing up to par.
3. Match Your Tone to Your Message
We’ve all seen the statistics about how much people rely on tone of voice and body language to understand the meaning behind what’s being said. Yet, we often forget that when we’re the ones doing the talking. We know what our intentions are, and assume they’ll come through if we use the right words but that’s often not the case. On a video conference, people have even less information than they had when everyone was in the same room.
If you’re distracted by a child doing school work in the next room or the cat jumping into your lap, a coworker may glimpse a disgruntled expression and think they said they’ve said the wrong thing. Be intentional about your tone of voice whether you’re expressing gratitude or concern. Smile when someone shares good news. Aligning your words, tone, and expression is the best way to get your point across.
Overall, good communication is both simple and intentional. The more senior you are and the bigger your role, the more important clear communication becomes. Don’t take it for granted that people will know your intentions or read between the lines.
Curious about how Reverb can help? Check out our executive coaching services, or take a look at our on demand management training.
